*of freaks

very disturbed by this freak. why does it look like a cross between a hamster, rat, and chick to me? i think the tail freaks me out the most coupled with it's chick-like legs. OK. it's the whole package. Ewww.

*readings

"What was once orgiastic devilry is now just another way of walking..."

-
Borges

*of random outbursts

WOAH CHECK OUT DADDY IN HIS FRED PERRY SHIRT!! hah. upon confrontation, he said, "we used to wear ralph lauren polos all the time too. you youngsters are unoriginal. we set all the trends" WOAH again.

this was taken when my inconspicious speck of a sister was not even yet a speck in this world. inexistant's the word.

and this was baking day with simmy my love! (heh, no we are not gg to show you the failed photos. only the pretty 'uns) the fluffy eggwhites before it became otherwise :( CHOC ECLAIRS NEXT! ( pierre hermes smth smth puff thing to be precise) on a day where we're not dazelike, and possess more patience.

last random photo! BP people just have this chemistry, it just flows somehow. even when we are on diff channels (uncle hui & uncle heng speak in extremely fast bullet-train like mandarin that we have to sometimes playback in our heads slowly to comprehend. and they claim me and simmy converse in extremely fast english, which is entirely untrue.) we somehow compromise with some rojak and it just all slips into place like a jigsaw!

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aight, im gone

*toothpaste adverts

we grit our teeth

because my camera has a smile function that apparently is either retarded or quite hard to fool.

(and to the 3rd person that has obliged, arent you glad i didnt post the picture up? :P, dont worry im a person of my word)

so kindly oblige and entertain me upon request alright ? :)

2MORE DAYS!!!!!!!

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PS. pls pray for me, that i'll be able to get a hostelroom. they said priority for foreign students, but i was thinking, doesnt curtin consist mainly or rather majority of the students are foreign students? AHHH... pray pray pray.

*rubbish succinctly put

always loved being in moving things. something about the constant change of environment and the therapeutic bumpbump rhythm that brings this somewhat calming effect unto me. absolutely have no qualms taking the bus even if it takes a longer time than the train.

ahh, the train! the train on the other hand. to be specific, the morning rush hour trains. it's a different story altogether. no, that particular mode of transport does not calm me at all. i'm actually quite suprised there's no one form of violence breaking out. and somehow it becomes perfectly alright to invade another's bubble of personal space, reducing perhaps a 50cm X 50cm space to a resemblance of vacuum-packed,sardine-canned people. they feel completely comfortable pressing their bodies into complete strangers just to get into the train. oh do not even suggest waiting for the next one, because the others who have managed to squeeze past you using their elbows or snubbing your little toe will just give you the OH-i-earned-my-place-so-you-can-wait look. Thank God most people shower in the mornings or atleast smell better. may i emphasize MOST. there was once an individual who decided since he was tall enough he could raise his arms to stabilise himself by supporting the ceiling (which serves the purpose of supporting him) i shall not try to describe this person as i might come out sounding like some racist snob, but omgosh please do not ever put me through that again. i had to skillfully maneuvre using hockeypockey moves to atleast turn my head from the aroma. another thing is HAIR! why do people think it's alright to stick their hair into your face? PLEASE TAKE YOUR SHOWERS IN THE MORNINGS. it perks you up! eeks. ok i should stop.

having whined and complained i've concluded that i generally just dislike the train due the the associations i've made with it to the rush hour crowd.

ME LIKES SCENIC TRAIN RIDES STILL. like those in europe :)

i do not abhore public transport though, i'd say many things have happened on busrides. especially with good company and stimulating topics! classic moments!

( 1. the shock-and-horror when we discovered we've been "bad-mouthing" and dissecting a person from the past was sitted right behind us! oh ofcourse we tried to hide.

2. having "guyish" conversations that are oh so shallow and will cause eavesdroppers to turn their heads out of curiosity

3.heart to heart talks whispered silently lest strangers eavesdrop )

just to name a few. oh and even if there's no company, it's a great time for reflection.

on an extremely happy note, i'm stopping work next friday! no more morning madness trains for me... cant wait cant wait..

so much to do, so little time.

i've been getting the weirdest cravings!!

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* i should really develop a habit of proof-reading or spell checking my entries. RAR!

apparently not gonna happen anytime soon.

*Of phases

It always amazes me how the needs/wants of the human being changes with age. How just the basic food, water and shelter that our predecessors yearned for and were so contented with just does not satisfy our insatiable appetites (or constantly wavering appetites) anymore.

As an egg and forming foetus in your mother’s womb, all you needed was nutrients and warmth, all of which was supplied directly into your blood.

Then, as a baby, all you needed was milk and your mother’s touch, naturally the majority of us got that too.

After that as a toddler, all it took were simple games and activities that can be repeated repeatedly and you never got tired of to keep you perfectly contented.

In the early school going age, we were ecstatic when we received stickers or small simple tokens (sweets, games…)

In the pre-pubescent age, we were perfectly contented with material things that gave us an identity that of us growing up and becoming a teenager ( new bag/your 1st cell phone perhaps in today’s context).

In your teenage years you yearn to be recognized to belong, to be seen as a respected individual and not a kid anymore.

And now comes the turning point. Where you’re at a point that you’re forced to make big decisions. The parents refuse to aid your decision-making when you want them to, saying you’ve got to learn to be on your own, but in retrospect still pull restrictions to some extent. They want to let go, but are still learning to let go of the long-held ropes slowly. They pull back sometimes, in fact plenty of times choking you, making the tension between both parties ever tighter. They try to placate you with materials things. Somehow it does not work anymore, tired of having to fake reactions and emotions that are expected of you. Thus, causing even more tension.

I’d like to continue through to adulthood and death. But I’m still stuck at the above point. Pray I’ll be able to feel my way through this.

Oh this tug-o-war is tiring me so.

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I keep having conversations in my head with myself at work these days. my hands know what they have to do on their own already and have developed like a second brain, thus, allowing my main brain to have conversations with itself. sometimes it drives me insane, i've had so many questions about virtually everything. most of the questions dont have answers to them.

I've got to stop thinking. i miss the days where i didnt think as much.